Friend, have you ever sat and wondered why something didn’t work, slipped from your grip, and got away?
Perhaps a lover who left before you were ready to let go,
or a job prospect that seemed an ideal fit, but went to another candidate?
There could be numerous things that you question the why of, the ‘what if’.
Why didn’t he love me?
Why didn’t they choose me?
Why didn’t that work out?
I am a firm believe that, ultimately, if it’s right – it happens.
Nothing meant for you will get away.
Yet, we try to force a lot of situations that just are not ours to keep.
At least, I’m guilty of this.
In these situations I remind myself that what is mine will come, sometimes I just need to wait … even if the waiting is hard.
In the process what is necessary is to learn from the people, things, and experiences that come and go – for in everything there is a lesson to be learned.
Tyler Perry as Madea voices this idea perfectly when he says that, “Some people come into your life for a lifetime, and some come for a season. You got to know which is which. And you’re gonna always mess up when you mix them seasonal people up with lifetime expectations … that was a person who was supposed to come and teach [you] one thing.”
This idea that there is something that slipped through your fingers is hopeful fantasy, and negates what you have within your grasp right now –
or places doubt on your future potential and what is already on its way to you.
Dwelling on what could have been has the danger of holding you back from accepting what is unfolding in your life right now because, as Jen Kim says in her article Is the ‘One that Got Away’ Real?;
“They are a lovely curse, forever trapped by our nostalgia.”
How true is that, friend, that allowing ourselves to be stuck on what was is a curse that is often viewed through rose colored glasses?
The truth is, for whatever reason; timing, distance, experience, where you are in your life … some things just don’t work, and that is okay.
Most thing that come into our lives are just visiting for a season, and in that season we are meant to experience or learn something,
or perhaps we are meant to be in a holding pattern for just a little while longer until we are ready for what is meant for us.
This does not mean that these interludes do not having meaning, for they do, and that meaning is in the lesson, the preparation that is happening until, finally, everything clicks and we find ourselves exactly where we were meant to be
and we understand why that lover left, that the job didn’t pan out, and on and on…
because when it’s right, and you’ll know it when it is, it happens.
So, until then, as Madea says, “Let. Them. Go.”
The Lover. The Job. The What if.
What is meant to stay, will stay.
Your Trusted Friend ❤