Be Someone

I am someone, not somebody.

The distinction is important.

This isn’t a grammar lesson, it’s a lesson in how you allow yourself to show up and be in other people’s lives, and what you accept into yours.

We as humans crave and desire intimacy, yet it is also one of the most feared aspects of human connection.

We want someone to see and know us, yet we are so afraid of being rejected, abandoned, and left that we often fail to fully show up or to give all of ourselves. We keep parts in reserve, hidden.

Instead, we settle for being and accepting somebody to satisfy the craving.

Somebody who maybe isn’t quite right for us, isn’t quite ready for us, or who doesn’t quite fit us.

We settle for the almost, both in giving and receiving, because the almost is good enough and really rather okay. If the ‘almost’ rejects us we can dust off and walk off knowing that we didn’t reveal all of us…

so they didn’t really reject all of us.

They just rejected somebody.

When we allow ourselves to be, instead, someone special, our unique selves completely and fully, when we receive love and acceptance of this caliper and allow ourselves to be someone special to someone else we are courageously vulnerable….

We have to be if we want to be open to love, acceptance, partnership, and truly being seen, and not in the ‘good enough’ kind of way…

Good enough is someone to keep you company. Good enough is someone to stave off the loneliness with. Good enough is a distraction. Good enough is the easy button.

Good enough is settling to be just a somebody…

Instead of waiting for someone and letting yourself be someone.

Someone is being seen for all of your quirks and habits and being accepted and chosen for everything that you are, “by someone that would never let you be anything less than your beautiful and sometimes flawed self” (@momentaryhappiness).

When this happens, this is the kind of love that will wake up wanting to learn you every day, want you, need you, love you in slow motion because you know that you have forever to grow, to learn, to change, to inspire, to adventure, to discover, to become again and again and again…

and it won’t be just “good enough”, it’ll be everything…

it won’t be somebody to fulfill the craving for intimacy, it’ll be the someone you crave because they brought your world alight… when you never knew it’d been in shadows.

If you feel you’re just somebody that is being used to fill time in order to chase off the loneliness, that you’re ‘just good enough’… cut them loose, because we don’t have time or energy for halfway anymore.

Always,

Your Trusted Friend ❤️