I’ve been an unbeknownst coward for a good deal of my life, friend.
Striving to control, grasp, and cling to things in an attempt to avoid the wreckage caused by pain and shattered illusions.
In many ways, I would define these acts as cowardly.
I trimmed my own wings and confined myself to a cage of my own making mistakenly thinking it safer.
Illusions are not meant to be lived within and the simplest things bring them crashing down around you.
Again and again this year I was reminded to let go; reminded that what is meant for me will come and stay without convincing or manipulation.
This requires so much faith.
Sometimes I’ve struggled to believe I have the required resources in reserves to have the kind of faith letting go and flowing with life has demanded of me.
Every plan I’ve made has been canceled, lovers have left, friendships have reached a conclusion, and the only consistent part of my job has been the fact that it is constantly changing.
Surprisingly, in these events I have found massive amounts of peace and calm.
I found a truer, more accurate, more authentic, and genuine version of myself only arrived at by letting go in the middle of the storm.
One that doesn’t lay claim, but who accepts what comes and what goes.
Stabilizing my energy and letting life pass through me without either force or resistance.
One who waits and ensures my actions are in integrity at my deepest core before acting.
How do I do this, friend?
These words (slow, release, flow, shed, surrender, peace) have become a mantra of sorts that has been paramount in recent months. Reasserting itself with each moment of uncertainty that I would normally attempt to control, force, or run from.
Instead of control, I seek peace.
Peace comes when my mind, body, heart, and willpower are all in alignment — whole and undivided.
Only when this happens will I act from a place of sovereign discernment, clarity, and connection to my innermost self.
This is what it means for me to flow with integrity.
To not force or coerce, but to value discernment and being chosen in connection.
I’ve been a coward, though, and have tried to bulldoze my course and swim upstream for so long.
It’s only now when I’ve been forced to relinquish control, that I have found the beauty in the surrender to the current and have allowed it to carry me to more beautiful spaces, places, and people than I could have ever envisioned.
When you flow with integrity, allowing your own inner voice to guide you to the right outcome — when you are able to patiently listen and follow where it leads — will you make space for your own personal brand of magic to arrive.
There is no need to rush, to fight, to resist…
it is already on its way.
You merely have to flow with integrity.
Your Trusted Friend ♥️