Who. Are. You?

Who. Are. You?

I punctuate this with intentionality, hoping you’ll hear each stressed syllable and note each pause between words as if I was speaking aloud to you, with the wish that you understand the sincerity and seriousness behind my query.

What would you say to define yourself?

Would you mention your career, your accomplishments, your status in relation to whether or not you’re a parent, your relationship status itself, your gender, your race, your ethnicity, your sexuality?

Or perhaps you’re a sum of your experiences. The places you’ve traveled and seen, the mountains you’ve conquered, the rivers you’ve braved.

Perchance you would identify yourself based on your career, your schooling, or your degrees. The various accomplishments framed on your wall.

Maybe you’d define yourself by your scars. The external and internal injuries you’ve suffered or been a victim of.

Would you hold back, friend, determine the definition you’d share based on who you’re sharing company with? Mold yourself into the version they’d find the most fitting, pleasing, and acceptable?

Who. Are. You?

What words can truly encapsulate a description of your heart, and the love you’re capable of giving?

Are there adjectives to describe the inner workings of your mind and the mysterious you keep there?

How about your indomitable spirit? Do you think a tongue is worthy of attempting to define the soul that lurks within you?

Perhaps you’d say you’re name, thinking that would be enough…

Hello, my name is…

As if that could somehow convey the sum parts of you that work together to create the wondrous creature you are.

And then I wonder.

How many people ask the questions that are required to find out who you are?

Furthermore, how many would then actually take the time to listen?

To climb the walls, brave the moat, and woo the barking dog to get close enough to discover all of your secrets?

Who would take the time to scale the walls that you’ve erected, and dismantle the barricades that you’ve constructed to protect the hidden, private parts of you? The vulnerable spaces you both long, and fear to share?

Who. Are. You?

Friend, you are so much – but never too much – and I long to see and learn all the parts of you, even the darkest corners and the deepest recesses. Don’t hide them or fear showing them, and please don’t try to cram yourself into a little box in an attempt to appear more manageable.

For I want to see and know you.

Even the parts that escape words.

Even the parts you are fearful to show.

Even more than this, though, I want you to take the time to get know you as well. To visit all the spaces you use for definition and then decide if you like who you see.

The best part, you – friend – get to decide and determine and declare who you are … and at any point you can change

and be brand new.


Your Trusted Friend ❤

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